Web 3.0, 6 Bladed Razors, 7 Minute Abs » Artistic

Nursery Rhyme Code Poem [CSS]

Zach Leatherman — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 14:04:41 +0000

Code Poems are fun! The trick is to take a nursery rhyme (but really, it could be any commonplace work of writing - Famous Speeches, Bible Verses, Famous Quotes, etc.), and then turn it into pseudocode. The code must follow both the programming or markup language you're using and the rhyme as closely as possible. See how precise you can make your rhyme fit. I accept critiques and suggestions for improving me rhyme code (or you could just rewrite my rhyme as you see fit).

#theChurch {}
#theChurch #theSteeple {}
#theChurch .door[state="open"] .people { visibility: visible; }
#theChurch #theParson { display: none; }
#theChurch> .upstairs #theParson:active { display: block; }
#theChurch #theParson:lang(prayers) { display: block; }

The above code poem is released under the BSD license. To use in production environment without error, do not include an element with an id attribute of "theChurch". Obviously I'm kidding, don't use this code. Not even for enterprise software.

Technorati Tags: CSS, poem, code poem

Nursery Rhyme Code Poem [JavaScript]

Zach Leatherman — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 02:48:40 +0000

(function()
{
function BlindMouse() {}
BlindMouse.prototype.tail = true;
BlindMouse.prototype.run = function(after) {};

var mice = new Mice(new BlindMouse(), new BlindMouse(), new BlindMouse());
alert(mice.declare());
alert(mice.declare());

function seeHow(they, func)
{
they[func]();
}

seeHow(mice, 'run');
seeHow(mice, 'run');

var farmersWife = function()
{
var weapon = 'Carving Knife';
return {
cutOff: function(creatures, prop)
{
creatures.cutOff('tail', weapon);
}
}
}();

mice.run(farmersWife);

farmersWife.cutOff(mice, 'tail');

function haveYouSeen(obj, timeSpan)
{
return true;
}

if(haveYouSeen('Such a Thing', 'Your Life')) {
alert('as ' + mice.declare() + '?');
}
}());

The above code poem is released under the BSD license. To use in production environment without error, please enclose with a try-catch block. Obviously I'm kidding, don't use this code. Not even for enterprise software.

Technorati Tags: JavaScript, poem, code poem

Nursery Rhyme Code Poem [PHP]

Zach Leatherman — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 01:54:14 +0000

class I {
public __construct()
{
$star = new Star();
$star->size = 'little';
$star->twinkle();
$star->twinkle();

self::wonder($star, 'What are you?');

$world = new World();
$world->elevation = 'So High';
$star->setAbove($world);

$d = new Diamond();
$d->position = 'In the sky';
$star->setLike($d);

$star->twinkle();
$star->twinkle();
$star->size; // returns 'little'

self::wonder($star, 'What are you?');
}

public static function wonder($obj, $query)
{
$obj->query($query);
}
}

The above code poem is released under the BSD license. To use in production environment without error, please precede with the following command: error_reporting(0); Obviously I'm kidding, don't use this code. Not even for enterprise software.

Technorati Tags: PHP, poem, code poem

Why Do Fame-Based Bloggers Act Like Children?

Zach Leatherman — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 04:42:01 +0000

Normally this blog is about JavaScript and front-end engineering, but today I'm going to play my once per six month rant-card and go on for a bit, so please bear with me. You can read my last rant-card here.

Ever open up your RSS reader only to be greeted with a collection of posts that feels like an episode of prepubescent Survivor (Sorry to international readers, that is an American TV reference). Whining, name calling, immaturity are all the rage nowadays, especially from so-called "professional" bloggers that seem more interested in their analytics package than providing decent content. Here's a few rules that I use for pruning my subscriptions that others might find useful:

If you're blog is named after yourself, that's one strike. Having a domain name named after yourself is fine (exempt myself?), but a blog should be about a subject, and unless you're posting about your dating life and the consistency of your cat's shit in the litter box (which may or may not overlap each other), your blog title should suggest a subject as well.

If you've posted about a meaningless internet pissing match (a trivial contest in which a group of people stand in a line and see who's urine can travel the most in-air distance), that's big strike number two. You're polluting my subset of the internet. You know what I'm talking about because we've all read those train wrecks.

If you're constantly plugging something that is not interesting, say goodbye. I don't mind it if you're talking about something that actually has value. I love reading Ask the Wizard, because he's actually writing about something useful, not just plugging FeedBurner (not that he'd need to).

Now take a moment to consider which blogs in your feed reader might match these criteria. Then indulge yourself and consider what actual value these blogs provide. If you like the entertainment of a good cat fight, by all means, keep reading. But if you're like me and find yourself with the conclusion that these blogs don't provide a wrinkle to the gray matter between your ears, I would encourage you to go into your feed reader and unsubscribe. The best thing you can do with a troll is to ignore them completely.

What blogs do you stay away from? (Titles only please, no links)

Technorati Tags: bloggers, blogging, rss, techmeme, techmeme-leaderboard, web-3.0